


chamomile breath (and other watercolor sketches)

by tsukum



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Drabble Collection, Missing Teeth, Poetry, Prose Poem, abandoned sheds, bitter cough medicine, blurry pictures taken on disposable film, chewing on mint leaves, crying in bathrooms with dirty sinks
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-10-21
Updated: 2014-11-30
Packaged: 2018-02-22 01:43:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 1,141
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2489873
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tsukum/pseuds/tsukum
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Consistently updated collection of Hunter X Hunter poetry/prose poetry. Includes my collabs with fan artists and ekphrastic pieces from fan artists' work.</p><p>Just wanted to have all my stuff in one place.</p><p>Warnings in the notes of each poem.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. preface/introduction/explanations/contact info

hello!

i’m boythroat, but also scarecrowings here on ao3 as my fallback pseud, and on tumblr right now i am guunyuu but i tend to change my url on there like i change my underwear. my actual name is amelia, though, so you can always call me that.

here is the explanation for this: i write a lot of poetry. and a lot of that poetry, lately, a disproportionate amount really, is fan poetry or fandom-inspired poetry, specifically poetry based off of hunter x hunter by yoshihiro togashi. from when i started writing that fan poetry until now, mostly i’d just been posting the poems on my tumblr, but that’s not horribly organized, and i’d like to have them all in one place. also, a lot of those poems were drafts when i posted them, so some of them i’d like to look at again and revisit and revise and so on.

most of these poems are going to have been posted on my tumblr (my tumblr url is guunyuu, but also, you can always access it by going to boy.myogaya.jp) in the past, possibly in a different form than they are in now. if they’re new poems, they’ll probably be archived here around the same time as being posted to my tumblr.

most of these poems will be about killua or gon, or they’ll be about killugon, or they will have things about alluka, or they will describe hisoka or they will talk about illumi. those five are the characters i tend to gravitate towards the most. there are warnings before each poem. these poems will all be safe for work. that’s kind of a lie, actually, but if a poem contains too much suggestive imagery it will be marked, in the chapter title, as (nsfw), so you can avoid it if you wish.

i tend to spend a lot of time explaining and justifying a piece of writing instead of just letting it stand on its own as a piece, so this is all i’m letting myself explain. the only things in the notes of each poem will be warnings, links to the original tumblr post if applicable, and links to the art piece it’s ekphrastically based off of if applicable. that’s it. i’ve already talked entirely too much.

 

**my contact info, if necessary:**

**tumblr:** <http://boy.myogaya.jp>  
**skype:** shingnohomo (if we have not spoken before, please introduce yourself when you send a contact request)  
 **pronouns (just in case?):** she/her or they/them

the fastest way to get a hold of me is most likely by sending a tumblr message.

* * *

 

i am ready. let’s begin.


	2. cardiomegaly

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> killua's ribcage is a chrysalis.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> title of the poem is **cardiomegaly**
> 
> revised version of [these journal entries](http://boy.myogaya.jp/post/97310059061/stuff-about-killua-scribbled-in-my-notebooks-line-by) i typed up to my blog on sep 9th, 2014
> 
> warning for discussion of organs and bones, although not in a gory context

At the Hunter Exam, the beginning, before everything, Killua starts as shadowrunner, as vulturestare, as knifesmile. This is a false Killua, or an exoskeleton, or a _hannya_ mask in the traditional style, or a bleeding eye, or a joke meant seriously. Gon starts to break it, finding the fault lines and digging his dirty fingernails into them without his own realizing.

-

ah

the heart is a muscle

ah, muscles get stronger if you use them

ah, smallflutter heartbeat of tiny newborn cardiac  
ah, arrythmia

killua worries; his heart is becoming too big for him  
parasitic, feasting itself  
suffocating all his other organs.

ah, killua

ah, gon

-

The caring feeling Killua harbors inside becomes sharper and more bright, and when you press it it hurts, the same as a broken bone.

And as it becomes bigger, Killua’s body strains and creaks from the force of the love

oh compass oh heirloom oh map oh dysfunction

-

They are just little boys, both of them!

Killua’s ribcage is a chrysalis,  
with a timer counting down.

Gon’s hands are sea charts.

The beating heart inside Killua swells more,  
engorging.

Please undoom them from this feeling so large--


	3. la llorona

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a legend they tell in towns alongside rivers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> title of this poem is **la llorona**
> 
> i wrote this today, actually, but i want to put it here
> 
> [original tumblr post](http://boy.myogaya.jp/post/100585024421/la-llorona-by-guunyuu-2014-hunter-x-hunter-c). this version is edited very VERY slightly
> 
> warning: vague mention of character death; that's it, really, i think

 

a story they tell in one part of the countryside  
of the republic of padokea, especially in towns  
alongside rivers, to scare their children:

a long long long time ago  
there was a young man with white hair like a ghost  
and thin strong bones like a hawk  
whose lover died, and he went mad with grief  
he locked himself in their house, in the kitchen  
where he had cooked pancakes for them in the morning, and   
howled for three days and three nights, the sounds of his mourning  
and the churning inside of him  
and destruction he unknowingly caused   
indistinguishable from a storm

they say on the fourth day he finally became one  
a thunderstorm i mean,  
his skin at last turned into dark, rolling clouds  
his shrieking was wind, and his lightning  
was just him cracking the sky apart for a moment  
to let the light shine through, trying to get to  
the next world where his lover was  
where he’d gone without letting him follow

they say, that is why storms are so powerful and sad  
they say, that is why thunder sounds like the words  
“my light, my light, my light”  
in a language everyone understands   
but no one remembers


	4. hearts (strawberry)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> doki-dokillua.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> title of this poem is actually really long: **i have RIPPED OUT hearts why are you making mine skip a beat this is ridiculous** , but that wouldn't fit in the dropdown title menu here. the alternate, shorter title **hearts (strawberry)** also works, i think.
> 
> this is a piece written in ekphrasis from czarrs' recent fanart of killua right here. i saw it, absolutely fell in love with it, and wrote a poem about it immediately. with her permission i've posted it.
> 
> this poem was originally posted to my tumblr [here](http://boy.myogaya.jp/post/100567466331/this-is-a-kirugon-poem-and-it-is-titled-i-have) on the 21st of october, 2014. i don't really count it as having been written today, though, because i posted it at 1 am last night.
> 
> **content warnings:** i honestly can't think of any, except that this is the gayest shit i've ever written.

killua has killed lots and lots of people.  
his hands are concealed-carry weapons  
he mastered the shadow step at age five.  
he knows artery locations. he knows where bones  
are easiest to break

but anyway gon has this way of fidgeting when he’s happy  
cracking his knuckles? smiling? and when that happen  
skillua’s not an assassin  
killua’s not related to assassins  
killua doesn’t know what an assassin is  
killua’s some stupid kid with grape jelly knees  
pink frosting heart  
soda pop stomach  
and the colors that wash themselves over his cheeks and  
the bridge of his nose  
are strawberry ice cream, hyperconcentrated;

his heart’s playing hopscotch again  
he’s happy like this?  
he’s happy like this


	5. hisoka character sketch #1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> i painted him in the form of a jackal.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> bruh.
> 
> warnings: death / gore / child death mention / illness
> 
> tumblr post: http://boy.myogaya.jp/post/104035982806/attempt-at-hisoka-character-sketch-1-by-300yen

 

imagine this: you have a bad fever, real bad fever, might not make it,  
you’re dreaming that you’re walking with dirty hands just before dawn  
through a narrow, narrow valley thick with dust and  
the corpses of bubonic plague victims under brown cloth shrouds,  
their limbs jutting out, bent like compass roses.  
when you look down at your own body there are words written on it  
in a language you don’t understand but they are unsettling. the ink of them  
red and brown like sores.  
you know that at the other end of this valley is the river styx.  
you walk because you are thirsty and you will drink any water.

in this dream, a jackal is always present. the jackal follows you  
without moving and sometimes it is closer to you and sometimes it is further away.  
when you close your eyes you only see the jackal,  
inside a nursery bedroom,  
standing over the crib,  
its face buried in the crib.  
you cannot see inside the crib but you can hear the jackal eat

the way hisoka smiles is exactly the way that jackal smiles at you


End file.
